Looking for inspiration everywhere I go

Inspiration is everywhere.

Yes, it is.

Look around you. Look next to you, from your right to your left. You get the picture. It is everywhere once you open your eyes and make yourself observe the world around you and awaken your imagination once again. Use all your senses if you need to fuel your creativity up until you feel inspired within.

Use your eyes to see more than what the surface shows you. Use your ears to hear hidden emotions through music. To listen when someone is opening their heart to you. To get reminded of your childhood when you smell certain scents. Surprise yourself by tasting unimaginable amount of flavours, let it humble you to know that any of those have been created by countless of people. Let it make you realize that creating isn’t only cut out for a small group of people.

Anyone can create, therefore, anyone can find inspiration anywhere they care to look.

For some, it just takes them a gaze or a particular thought to shake their creative muscles up and get it to work. For some, it takes much more to even get to the part of warming up. What follows are hours, days or even months of staring aimlessly at the flickering cursor of the screen and somehow find it surprising why a flood of awe-inspiring goodness doesn’t come around and shows up voluntary on the screen. These things only happen in a nonexistent perfect world, unfortunately.

However, an attempt to comforting myself, what is all the fun of it if inspiration just comes around without making zero effort for it and all. What is the use of it when it will just be handed freely to you?

I believe inspiration requires us to put ourselves out there and gain more experiences.

But that doesn’t mean I imply inspiration as something which you can plan step by step in order to obtain it. It can be a spur in the moment kind of thing or when you carefully track down all your experiences to find something you have learned about or just feel inspired by it.

At least, that’s what I have been trying to do so far. I have been lucky to have had inspiration on the spur of moments as if I’m lucky enough to find a pot of gold at the rainbow’s end. However, I’m running out of gold and it just happens that there aren’t many rainbows within sight to look for more pots of gold. Just my luck!

That’s why I’m going to look for inspiration to put myself out there once again to create it myself instead of letting it happen to me.

Because what’s inspiration to a creator if he/she doesn’t create it themselves?

Pots of gold are tempting, yes, but I don’t want to only have the easy outcomes. I want to actually experience it in fine details until I can turn my source of inspiration while using my imagination, into the kind of creation it deserves to be from the very first start.

That’s why I’m going soon.

Looking for inspiration everywhere I go.

From the girl who rambles through life

Sisters

Sisters

Who can’t live without them?

I have always been surrounded by women since the day I was born. It already started when I grew up with three sisters besides me. Each of them has a whole different personality even though we have lots of similarities in a way or another, which makes it even more interesting to be around each other.

But there is one thing for sure we all have in common, which is that we are all incredibly strong in our own way. As soon as I got older, our age gap becomes smaller in which I get to know them in a whole another light. I always have looked up to my sisters for they all work really hard for the things they find important and never really have turned into the kind of people I wanted to throw out my life. When I heard how other siblings treat each other or has practically a nonexistent bond, then I can proudly pat myself on the shoulder that this scenario will never happen to us.

Sisters

It’s a rare bond no one else can mimick because it is one of a kind. When one of us accomplish something, we are proud of each other instead of hiding behind a mask of jealousy. We are each others supporters for life even though the rest of the world may want to take us down or when other women treat us badly. We all have our own insecurities but we don’t let that define us. We can make jokes without nuance and not be afraid to have offended one another.

Even though it’s kind of a misfortune to have girls in our culture, I’m glad we are not living up to that picture. I’m glad we can stand strong on both feet and be proud to be a woman and not to feel ashamed that we don’t have any brothers in our household. We are instead living up to our potential with all these necessary obstacles blocking us here and there.

But it’s okay because we have each other.

Sisters

It makes everything just a little bit less difficult.

From the girl who rambles through life

You don’t have to always finish what you have started

It’s in my nature to seek for discoveries and adventures, even though I love to be able to stay inside for a while and be a couch potato, wrapped myself tightly in a blanket with zero social encounters whatsoever and entertain myself with my own company. I often go from one extreme to another and struggle to find balance within the spectrum of going outside and do stuff or just stay inside and enjoy myself.

It has its odds for I go all-in when I discover something new to work on or when I come up with a new idea in my mind. I would get unstoppable and motivated that I would slowly suffer from a lack of vitamin D for all the nonexistent times I went out for a stroll and decided to work on whatever I needed to work on that required me to stay inside. Ah well, it wouldn’t make a big difference, to begin with for my country favors drizzly rain with a side of wind that would slap you awake from your cozy daydream. On the other hand, I risked to get sunburnt or undercooled for that time when my body won over my mind and felt like jogging nonstop for a couple of months, for almost every day within that time frame. What was I thinking?

Unfortunately, I don’t always finish everything I have started.

Who am I kidding? I can say with certainty that I almost never finish something I have started.

I know, bad habit.

But it can also be a good thing. When I think about stuff I used to do but no longer do, it mostly consists of exercising in general or things I ONLY did to help or to please someone to an extent that I do not enjoy myself any longer.

Let’s ignore that exercising part for now because I’m not your typical Instagram fit girl. So just forgive me for now.

Let’s instead zoom into the things I mainly did for the sake of other people. A small selection of it: listening to other’s problems and thoughtfully thinking of what to say back, even though the counterparty only waited for me to finish my story, just to reply and shift the direction of the conversation on themselves again; lightening up the atmosphere within my previous group of friends to make sure everyone is still happy and sound, even though I may have a shitty day myself; shutting my mouth during a confrontation to avoid any potential drama just to feel tiny and useless afterwards.

In this case, I’m glad I stopped doing what I did for years. There is no one to blame and I shouldn’t either because, in the end, it’s all down on me. But that’s also the beauty of it;

I am the one who started it, so it would only be natural when I’m the one who stops it

And that’s exactly what I have been doing the past couple of years; healing and rising again from those losses by writing, traveling, genuine voices, helping without neglecting myself, comfort food, listening ears and making my (inner) voice stronger to voice my opinions and stand up for myself when it is needed.

I’m not stopping yet, and I have a feeling this will never ever end for my sake. Sometimes it’s a good thing when you haven’t finished what you started. Sometimes, you should stop what you’re doing, take a step back and start doing things and meeting other people which are healthy for yourself.

Because being mentally healthy is just as important as being physically healthy. 

Okay, let me resume my exercises again. Will you excuse me? 

From the girl who rambles through life 

If he just opens his eyes, he would have noticed her.

If he just opens his eyes, he would have noticed her.

But he didn’t.

He never really has opened his eyes to see what’s in front of him. He has never noticed the disappointment in her eyes when he didn’t look her in the eyes when they were talking. Goes the same when she was glowing from within when she was telling something funny to make him laugh. He never really looked her in the eyes. Her eyes that said everything about how she felt.

He didn’t want to face the fact that he was taking her for granted. Spoken words can mean so much, but a knife cuts on two sides. Maybe those words were sincerely spoken from his heart but without action to give those words its meaning, it will just word in the end. Just words echoing in her ears which slowly made her feel hopeless and insecure about herself. She didn’t want to give up on something in which she knew had great potential to thrive into even something more greater. She never wanted to give up because she never even has considered it as an option. But lately, giving up is all she is heading to, even though she tried hard to withhold herself from even thinking about it.

Her nights became more restless and tears were more insight than her smiles. He had no clue until she talked to him about it. Promises were made and she was successfully being reassured for a couple of days before her flood of tears came by again during nights. It was tiring, exhausting to a point where she looked blankly at the ceiling, wondering how this all could have happened.

She traced back the footsteps in their relationship and in doing so, she tried to find out what exactly went wrong.

What could have gone wrong? What could possibly have gone wrong?

We say life has its ups and downs, just like relationships have theirs. In order to live, we simply have to be alive.
What makes a relationship work in the very first place? Same thing.

It needs to be alive.

Without it, there are no ups and downs. It can make us skip a heartbeat when it feels too good to be true. But when the heart rate monitor shows a straight line, a line going perfectly straight from A to B, it means it has no progression whatsoever. When we don’t grow in life, then life will pass by us in return. Without progression in a relationship, it will get stuck at some point, be it in the form of excessive comfort with each other which can lead to taking granted of. It’s not merely alive, just hanging on a thin thread, dangling between a better future or a painful farewell.

If he just opens his eyes, he would have noticed her.

From the girl who rambles through life

Here is to making new memories

A new year has approached. Happy new year!

If you have read my blog frequently, you may know that I’m not a bit of a planner myself. In my case, the only time I can plan properly is when there are deadlines lurking around, blocking my way to the exit of reality. Anytime other than that, I pretty much ramble through life. And that’s not per se a bad thing for me! See the connection now with Rambles by Kim?

With a new year comes naturally new resolutions. Many resolutions, however, no matter how good intended, end up in the trash bin before it even has the slightest chance to blossom. So, how can we make resolutions that will work or at least will take you to the right direction to start off with?

My two cents? I guess it’s about constantly checking upon ourselves and reflecting back throughout the journey we are on. It’s not really helping when you only reflect back by the time the clock hits midnight and people start to open up champagne bottles and give smooches around the table. It’s not helping at all when your only intention is to post it online for other people to see it and not processing it by yourself. By continually do self reflection we open our eyes for those parts of us we didn’t knew we had. We will get frustrated and enlightened when you finally understand that life is nor fair or unfair because we are in control of our own lives in most cases but also lots of things are out of our own control.

You can only be 100% in control of the reactions you willingly give out by the circumstances you end up in.

You would start to think first before to speak impulsively to prevent unnecessary dramatic outcomes.
You would get more grasp on humans behaviour for we all represent a part of it. In a best scenario, this can make us more empathic with each other. Thus, less miscommunication, more understanding towards each other and hopefully we start to get our hopes up in each other instead of building up our walls even higher than they already are.

When you regularly look at your own actions, the results that come with it, and thinking how you can do it better the second time around AND acting according to it. Then, you my friend, are already making resolutions for yourself and succeed in making it true. It’s always easier to make small changes instead of going all over the place at once.

It isn’t about a new year, a new you.

That’s just making yourself feel better if you have fucked up another year. Let’s not. Life is not a game you can reset by the time it reaches a new stadium.

You can not undo mistakes and ignore decisions you have made.

It’s about constantly looking in yourself, one step closer to understanding each other, not blaming others for the results you get of your own actions. In other words, improving. And most importantly, let’s not forget in the midst of all those reflections,

breathe and make new memories and may all your actions blossom and thrive you into the person you wish to be! 

From the girl who rambles through life